Every once in awhile, I have to ask myself if I'm responsible for my son's (Jon) nursing school education and nursing degree. I think any parents paying for college should ask themselves that question at least once or twice since paying for college is a huge financial commitment.
The Responsibility is All Mine
A year after Jon graduated from high school, I saw that his life was going nowhere fast. He was content to live at home and kept applying for jobs which paid minimum wages or a little more. He wouldn't work at fast food joints, so his choices were that much more limited. In the early spring of 2005, after watching Jon spend most of his waking hours playing video games with his fellow video game addicts, I decided to send him to live in the Philippines, with relatives. He was a dual-citizen (American and Filipino) by birth due to a Philippines repatriation act in 2003, so I knew it wouldn't be too much trouble. I figured that even if he couldn't or wouldn't improve his life, he could at least get some form of education. By the beginning of summer, Jon left with my mother-in-law and moved to the Philippines.
The fact that my wife and I decided to move to the Philippines a few months later was purely coincidental, although I'm sure my concern for Jon's welfare had something to do with it.
Assuming Responsibility
I wouldn't be responsible for Jon's nursing school education in the Philippines if I hadn't been the person to force him into it. If it was his choice, providing his education would have been completely optional. Since I am responsible for him being here in the first place, I'm responsible for supporting him until he's able to support himself, regardless of education. It wasn't his choice and therefore, I assume full responsibility.
Jon started attending the first semester of nursing school at George Dewey Medical College, formerly Global City Innovative College at the Subic Bay Freeport Zone almost exactly a year after arrival.
High Hopes
Despite the fact that I thought Jon would never be able to finish nursing school in the Philippines due to his learning disability, he's not very far from graduating with a nursing degree. He's only had one setback due to failing a required course the first time around. Had it not been for that, he would be graduating with a Bachelor of Science in Nursing this summer, along with his peers.
Once Jon graduates from college, he'll be moving back to the US to live with his older brother (and family) while he studies for and passes the required board exams. From that point on, the future is all his and I'll no longer be responsible for anything he does or doesn't do.
Yes, I have high hopes for Jon and I'm more than happy that I'm able to put him in a position where he'll be independent and self-sufficient (unlike all the other relatives I have around here). Isn't that the position all parents really want to be in?
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- Life After College — Is My Son Going to be a Nurse or What?
- My Son is now a Nursing School Graduate
- George Dewey Medical College, School of Nursing
This article is published as: Am I Responsible for my Son's Nursing School Education and Nursing Degree?
Well we are in a unique position with Filipina wives I doubt we will ever be out of our kids lives, at least as much a we might like to be.I have two sons one who is 33 years old and still lives in our house and other with two masters degrees, married and doing well. But I feel my wife wants us too involved in both their business. I want to get together for the holidays etc, BBQ now and then and go our ways. I don,t feel it is my responsibility to act every time someones car breaks down or that I have any say so in how they spend their money. I want a grass shack and a hammock on the beach in the Philippines and to be left alone! Move there and Id have the whole country to worry about. Damm.
Not really the whole country but the analogy is good.
Sometimes the pressure that parents put on their kids is too much. When parents push their kids in one direction, the kids will always rebel in another fashion. If you as a parent instilled the moral values necessary for him to be a strong man, you have nothing to worry about.
I agree that once he's back in the US, he should be able to support himself. Even if he fails once in a while, he'll learn a valuable lesson of independence. Just don't always bail him out and he'll be fine.
Sometimes the pressure that parents put on their kids is too much. When parents push their kids in one direction, the kids will always rebel in another fashion. If you as a parent instilled the moral values necessary for him to be a strong man, you have nothing to worry about.
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I would recommend that, since you guys are already invested in this nursing thing, to have him attend a better school in the metro area. That way when he gets back stateside he'd be more equipped for this career path.
Metro Manila? I don't think so. Who defines better?
Facilities..Instructors..and..given that its within the city….proximity to medical institutions that can provide some sort of training…just my two cents
Pressure for kids is not good. Parents needs to understand the things.
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It's great that he is getting education. I think that you pushing him to do more certainly had something to do with his nursing education.
I don't think there is anything wrong with letting a child be responsible for financing his or her education.
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while te education is going on people should try that the burden of financing should not fall on the shoulders of the student because it will distract his or her mind.
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