RSS Feeds: In My Little Area Of The World, My Word Is LAW
I live in a compound of sorts. My house faces the street; on my left is a row of three houses that descend a slope. There is a barrier wall to the left of those houses and to the rear of the last house. My rear wall is connected to that wall and I have a wall bordering the creek on my right side. When everything is completed, and I do mean everything, I'll take extensive pictures of the compound. It isn't beautiful, but it's mine. Just for a quick history lesson in case you never spotted it in a previous article, I bought the land for the houses next door back in 1987. The only thing that was there back then was a "bahay kubo", a house made of bamboo, and banana leaves, with just enough milled wood to keep it all together. I bought the land for my own house in 2005, long before I decided to move here.
Everyone living in the compound are relatives. A mother-in-law, sisters-in-law and their husbands, brothers-in-law and their wives, and a whole slew of nieces and nephews. It's hard to explain, but I (through my wife) have been in control of their lives for more than 20 years.
You might think I'm being arrogant in saying that my word is law around here, but I'm not. When there's a dispute of any kind, I'm the final authority, outranking my elders and even my mother-in-law. When I get angry, they scatter like roaches and hide. I once caught two of my nephews painting graffiti on the wall of a nearby store (that was long since closed) and it made the area look nasty. I told their mother they needed to whitewash that wall and it was done by the end of the next day, without any arguments whatsoever.
Most of the adults are not uneducated, having completed at least high school. My mother-in-law lived with me for at least 10 years in the US (along with her now deceased husband). They all speak English as a second language, even if they don't want to do so. That's okay, because I speak their language and I'm getting better at it all the time. I think the reason they listen to me and my wife is because of our combined experiences. Sometimes, I detect a little resentment from some of them because of their lack of experiences.
I sat back and thought about it today, after my oldest sister-in-law cooked breakfast for me and my son. Could it be because I financially support them? No, because the two families I support know that they don't have to do anything for me at all or listen to me at all. I gave both husbands specific duties to earn the money (so it wouldn't seem like charity to them). They are doing those duties month after month, so there's no problem at all. The sister-in-law that cooked for me has only received 100 pesos from me in over a year — her husband makes very little doing odd jobs, but they also mooch off my mother-in-law who draws social security from the US based on her husband's employment (she didn't work long enough to qualify).
My span of influence is somehow continuing to grow. I now have neighbors and other relatives outside the compound coming to me as the final authority in their own family matters. Although I'm somewhat amused by it, I have absolutely no idea why it's happening. Perhaps thoughtful and beneficial decisions are addictive to the recipients. All I can say is that it can be very, very tiring at times.
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So, how's it going over there Colonel Kurtz?
Well, this isn't Vietnam or Cambodia and I don't have people killed. So all is swell.
Funny, I had a similar image pop into my head when I began to read this article (it was quite a cartoonish picture), without the killing, etc. I was thinking more of you sitting on your jungle throne being attended to by concubines, etc. But, as you probably gathered, I'm a bit of a sick bastard.
Come to think of it, maybe my cartoonish thought 1s more like the J Peterman character in "Seinfeld" when he went away on his quest (and the Elaine character had to go find him as she had been left to mismanage his company).
To me that's heroic. If you can run for a barangay official position there, many will surely vote for you. :)
Wrong race, wrong nationality. It might be possible, but I would probably lose my U.S. citizenship when I apply for Filipino citizenship in a few years.
Thanks for stopping by, Gabriel. I hope you realize that despite all their drawbacks, this is my family and I love them dearly.
Honestly, I don't know how you do it. I feel the weight of responsibility sometimes quite heavily merely supporting my own family of four.
Me and God, we be mates.
You have become the tribal chief my friend. It isn't going to change, so enjoy the ride. You will do fine grasshopper. :)
Are you by any chance one of those village elders/landlords they show in our Indian movies who always chews betel leaves and tobacco, spits it out in a silver vessel which a lackey carries with him and starts giving judgement while seated under a banyan tree? :grin: :lol:
Sounds like at times this would be an opportunity for some of your relatives to take the easy way out and make you into the "bad parent"! :wink:
I would like to be in your position.
It makes you feel loved.
I can just imagine the scenarios and the situations you're describing… No, forget that – I KNOW the situation you're describing!!! I see it many, many times in my own little community.
Could this be because you're relatively more financially well-off than them, all things considered? Or is it because of your omnipotent wisdom and benevolent character? :lol:
Hey, does your wife read this blog :wink: . (Watch out for ya wify; she can be very scary :razz: ).
And by the way, please keep up the posts on the situation over there. I'm quite interested in what's it like over in another world. (maybe i'll visit your world–and other worlds–someday :).
A picture's worth a thousand words…I look forward to seeing the compound.
I was trying to think of something clever to say, but I don't think I can beat Hari's comment! Good one Hari! ;-)
Check this out:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0306644/
RT must fit into that mould I think :mrgreen:
lol…from now on RT is no longer RT…he is simply:
"The Arbitrator"